20

Dear Sweet Jessica,

Happy 20th Birthday!

Do you know that even when I look into your eyes I can still see the little girl you once were? I have to look a little bit deeper each year because you have so beautifully grown into a young woman who takes me by surprise. 

This past year, more than any others, has been such a significant time in your life. I have seen firsthand your determination, strength and resolve. You have been a young woman that is following hard after God and desiring His will more than anything else. 

As you go through this upcoming year and all that will come your way, my prayers for you will continue. One of my greatest privileges as your mom is being on my knees for you. 

I pray that the Lord directs every single step you take and then you continue to walk by faith even when you can't see what is in the distance. Your Jesus knows everything that is up ahead for you and He will guide you.

I pray that you constantly know His affection for you. You are His and He delights in you. I want you to always remember that even in the struggles and disappointments that He has your very best interest at heart.

Even in your short life, you have story after story of how He has been faithful to you. That is your foundation sweetheart and what you build your trust in Him upon. 

I pray that He gives you courage when you are afraid, wisdom and discernment when you are unsure, and strength when you are weak.

I pray that He places opportunities before you that are divinely inspired for you to share His love. There is a reason and purpose for the people and circumstances that the Lord brings into your life. I pray that you see these as significant and that you recognize they can be holy moments even though they may appear as interruptions.

As a young woman, I pray that your security is in Him alone and that your heart only wanders to the One whose love is steadfast, unfailing, and forever.

I pray that as His will unfolds in your life, you have a strong sense of purpose and direction and that you will boldly take the steps of obedience that are required of you.

I pray that you seek Him earnestly, persistently and that you experience His boundless love for you. I pray that you have a love for His word and that He breathes and speaks life into every word so that it comes alive to you.

Let the life you live be pleasing to Him and offer everything you do and say back to Him as an act of worship. I pray that He uses your gifts and talents to glorify Him and that others are are drawn to Him through that. May your heart be broken over the things that break His heart so that you can serve Him passionately and in complete abandonment. He has given you a voice and a heart of compassion my sweet girl to speak of justice and the freedom that can only be found in Him.

May you always live fearlessly for Him, walking always by faith and being that wild woman for Jesus that I love so very much.

Love,
Mom

Let the Countdown Begin...

This morning my husband and I watched our daughter, Jessica leave for school for the last time. Where has the time gone? As we came inside I asked him if her remembered her first day of school. We made the choice for Jessica to be home schooled at that time and it was a year that I will never forget. There she was this little 5 year-old girl with a pony tail all dressed up in her jean shorts and t-shirt. I have a picture of her sitting at our kitchen table for her first day of kindergarten with this quirky smile on her face.

We both made it through that first year of school and it is a time that I will never take back or regret doing. A lot was learned that year... for both of us.

There has been a lot of recollections these past few weeks of all the "firsts" and "lasts". I am storing up a lot of memories these days and trying not to be too emotional. Not that I have the tendency to do that or anything.

Today, Jessica we celebrate with you. All that you have accomplished and most of all for who you are. We love you so very much! You have done well my sweet girl.

Countdown to graduation... 3 days!!!

Dear Jessica,

You have been working so hard this last week and I want you to know how proud I am of you.

I know that this research paper is about to do you in but keep persevering. Late nights of reading, writing, and watching documentaries will soon be over and you will be able to get back to the things you enjoy doing most. I know you don't want to hear me to tell you that this is making you a better person, that you are gaining so much by the work you are putting forth, that you are stretching yourself by learning something new- something that will one day be of benefit, and that you truly will have a sense of accomplishment when it is all said and done.

The end is near my sweet girl... keep pressing on!

God Is Good...

What a week (really I should say the last two!) it has been. After staying with Sarah for the last week, I returned home on Saturday. These last two weeks have been nothing but amazing as we celebrated the early arrival of Anna Claire. She is now in an open crib, receiving some bottling feedings, and hasn't really had any apnea spells in the last few days. When she was weighed the other night, she weighed in at 4 lbs. 9 oz. so, at this point she has surpassed her birth weight of 4 lbs. 7 oz. A coming home date hasn't been set yet as they are wanting her to be able to sit in her car seat for 30 minutes without any problems, continue to gain weight, and have her bottle feedings down. She really is doing great and we are all so proud of this tiny bundle of pure joy!

I have found myself this morning getting back into my routine here at home... packing lunches, getting the kids off to school, catching up on piles of laundry, and planning our meals for this week. It's been quite awhile since I have read any blogs and also writing some new posts. These last two weeks have brought many things to my mind that when I have some time will put into words. In particular, this past week was not only filled with continued good reports on Anna Claire, but our daughter, Jessica found out that she was accepted into YWAM (Youth With A Mission) and will be attending their DTS (Discipleship Training School) in Maui (yes, Maui!) and will be leaving on September 10th. As I would sit in the hospital with my sister, we talked of what an incredible moment this was for both of us. Here she is with this new baby daughter while I am in the place of preparing to send my daughter off. As I sit here right now, I am filled with thankfulness and praise for what God has done in our families life. He has answered our prayers, made it known that He is near, been our comfort and source of strength, and has made our joy complete. God is good.

Happy Birthday Jessica...

It seems that all I hear myself saying lately when looking at my daughter is,"Where has the time gone?" 18 years have flown by faster than I can even believe. There were days that I thought would never end, yet now I would take some of those days back in a heartbeat. To have her cuddle in my lap with her Bear-Bear and sucking her thumb, to see her walking around playing dress-up, playing with her baby dolls, and to just hear her sweet little voice.

Days of dressing- up (and she did it well!) are now replaced with trips to the mall to go shopping. The cuddling doesn't happen like it used to but there are still many hugs to be found. The baby dolls, dollhouses, and other toys are all packed up in boxes and hopefully will one day be passed onto a daughter of her own. And that sweet, little voice is now a voice of a young woman who has opinions of her own. A voice that isn't afraid to ask the hard questions in life. A voice that can talk about things that really matter. A voice that will make a difference in the world.





The maturity, confidence, passions, and love for the Lord she has amazes me. She has a wonderful sense of humor, and desires to live life at it's fullest. She is intelligent, compassionate, discerning, and often so wise beyond her years. God really has begun an incredible work in her heart and her life and I look forward to seeing His plan unfold. I have learned so much about who I am as mom through Jessica. Things I know I could have never learned on my own. Through that, I have deeply learned about who God is as my Heavenly Father.


Today I celebrate my daughter's 18th birthday. I celebrate who she is and all that she is becoming.


Happy Birthday and I love you so very much my Jessa girl.

Homecoming...

Last night, Jessica attended her Senior Homecoming...

This is Jessica's best friend, Morgan. When Jessica went to school the first day of her Freshman year, I began praying that God would bring into her life a best friend.

Little did I know, there was another mom who was praying the same thing for her daughter. Jessica and Morgan sat by each other in one of the classes the first day, and have been best friends ever since.

This year was a lot of fun because Jessica and her group of friends decided they would go without dates. I wish this would have been the "cool" thing to do when I was in high school! It was so much fun to see these girls together having fun. Instead of going out for dinner, Morgan's mom prepared a special lasagna dinner for them. Then, it was off to the dance!

Our Girl...

Let me introduce you to our daughter, Jessica. She is 17 years old and this year she is graduating from high school. I'm sure that I will posting a lot about Jessica in the days and months to come because of the many exciting things that are going on in her life right now. God is working in a huge way in the heart of this amazing young woman.

This is such an exciting time for Jessica and for us as her parents. When your children are young, you see personality traits, as well as gifts and talents that God has given them from the very beginning. Over the years, you see those traits begin to really grow, change and develop. That's where we are with Jessica right now. When Jessica was little, she had the typical strong-willed child personality. She was independent, tested her boundaries, and wanted to do things on her own and her way. To be honest, she wore us out. We were always trying to be one step ahead of her. We read every book we could on child-rearing and discipline. We prayed and prayed and prayed. I'm so thankful and I truly praise God that over the years, He has shown Steve and me how to parent her. The Lord gave us wisdom, patience, and encouragement. We never wanted to break her of who she was. We totally believed that God would use the things about her for His glory.

Jessica is determined, reliable, confident, dedicated, honest (too honest sometimes!) and fair. Loyalty and trust are very important to her. If you need someone in your corner, Jessica is your girl. Her compassinate and caring heart is what guided her to be a student aide for mentally and physically handicapped children the last two years at school. She loved these kids. Everyday she would come home with a story about one of "her" kids, whether it was teaching them how to use a soda machine or teaching them how to make a phone call. I am also very proud to say that Jessica is a leader. Her leadership qualities are being used in school, work, and in the youth group. Again, I know that God has a wonderful plan for her.

One of the qualities that I love the most about her though is that she is your classic example of a true extrovert. I think I admire this so much in her because I am the exact opposite. I really just love to watch her. The love she has for people and to be around people totally and completely thrills her. Relationships are really what make Jessica tick. She is a great listener, encourager, very discerning, and really just wants to be your friend. I know that God is going to use this greatly because of her answering His call to serve full-time in missions. When asked the question on a personality test... "How would you describe hosting the perfect dinner party?" Her answer was, " I would have a huge BBQ and I would want whoever wanted to come to be there." That's Jessica. There is a side of her that can be very serious, but one thing about Jessica is that she wants to have fun, and lots of it. Jessica is funny, very funny really and she can completely catch you off guard with her sense of humor.

Jessica also loves her family, and she loves us well. It's not always easiest being the oldest, and the only girl. Her brothers look up to her very much. She gives them advice, sets a good example, encourages them to love Jesus and live their lives for Him, and accepts them for who they are. There is nothing she wouldn't do for her brothers.

I have learned many thing about myself because of having Jessica as a daughter. We are a lot alike, she probably wouldn't want to admit that, but at the same time, the things that make us alike, are displayed so differently in each of us. This has stretched me and grown me. I've allowed her to be the little girl, and now the young woman that God wants her to be, not what I expect her to be. She is bold, strong, and courageous, and not afraid to try new things. I admire this in her. Over the last several of years I have seen her relationship with the Lord grow and become her own. She is passionately serving Him and trusting Him with the things He has in store for her.

We love you Jessa Bessa. Thank you for the blessing you are. Thank you for your smile, and that thing about you that makes people around you believe in themselves and in a loving God. You challenge us, motivate us, and inspire us. We are SO proud of the young woman you are. You are my wild woman for Jesus! You are our girl. We love you!